Presidential death cycle

One of the few ideological disagreements between my girlfriend and myself is our respective opinions regarding the validity of astrology. I had been planning to post a scathing criticism of this so-called “science,” but instead I’m going to look at something much more fun: the Presidential Death Cycle!

The idea is that every president elected on a multiple-of-twenty year, starting in 1840 with William Harrison, has been assassinated or died in office, with the exception of Ronald Reagan in 1980 and George W. Bush in 2000. This curious fact coincides with an astrological phenomenon wherein Jupiter and Saturn coincide.

As the article states, “It is common knowledge that the Reagan Presidency relied heavily on astrology in the making of important decisions in the White House.” All right, American people, listen up: let’s put aside our differences for a moment and agree to never fucking elect a fucking president who believes in fucking astrology again. In fact, let’s just agree not to elect any more idiots, period. Great.

Reagan supposedly escaped his death-in-office by heeding the astrological signs. But our current president may not be so lucky. (We’ll just have to wait and see, I guess.)

Another article states that Mars is strong in George W. Bush’s presidency, especially the first two years. The astrologer predicted several months before 9/11 that there could be a “new scenario of violence” affecting the U.S. and its president. Maybe there is something to this astrology thing after all!

Or maybe, like psychics, only the successful predictions get noticed. After all, Reagan’s death occurred during a rare astrological phenomenon known as the “Transit of Venus.” Does that mean Reagan’s death (from Alzheimer’s) has some sort of special significance? Of course not! And if he hadn’t died during the Transit of Venus, the astrologers would have found some other event to bray loudly about while pointing wildly.

In a world without leaders
Who’d start all our wars?
The world that you’re saving
Will always be yours

—Offspring, “Kill the President”