Callie’s Journal
None of us knew Freki was a werewolf, but I guess getting bitten is the kind of thing that could trigger the transformation. We’ll have to figure out how to calm him down without hurting him too much.
We’re in combat! The undead leaders are fleeing while we make coleslaw out of the minions.
Bec sees a bat and is inspired to whack it with her bat (mace, but who’s counting?). She ends up smacking it straight into Cal, where it bounces off his abs and falls to the ground.
Cal picks up a petrified creature and swings it around, hitting five of eight of the undeads surrounding him. He lets it fly! Man, this is exciting! What if we gathered athletes every year to compete against each other at throwing petrified zombies?
Vondal uses the Wand of Wonder at the mist. His hair stands on end, bursts into flame, gets sucked into his body, and shoots out the wand as a fireball! Somehow this also entails shooting Roger (the servant from the basement of the mansion) out the wand. He winds up sort of inside one of the mist creatures? Look, this has been a really weird day.
A massive fireball washes over everything on the field of battle. Hmm, this would be another good event for my new sporting venture. I could sell a ton of snacks.
Bec runs over and yells at me to help calm Freki down. I promise that I will as soon as I can.
Roger reaches out a spectral…tentacle…and pats Freki on the shoulder because he’s looking unwell.
Freki is creeped out and attacks him! He says, “Owww… I can’t hold on forever, you know.”
All of the hostile undeads seem like they’re neutralized or fleeing, so I drop the bless spell and cast calm emotions to hit Freki.
Freki feels very calm, and thinks that he always knew about the beast inside, even though he was surprised earlier. He has gained a deeper understanding of his wolf nature. And his bird friends are back!
Munin: “I remember now. All is as it should be again.”
Hugin: “Vecna’s hold over us has been broken.”
Oz wonders how long he’s been a wolf. Freki says he’s always been that way, so it’s probably the Flux making us forget. He says he comes from a village of Lycanthropes and Talos killed his father.
There is a twinkling in the distance, and as it grows closer, someone is waving. “Hello! Don’t shoot! Hello there! M’lord Lestache sent me! I mean no harm!”
It’s a halfling on a flying carpet, flanked by bats. He lands the carpet, and the bats transform into vampires, who stand there wordless. They look like bodyguards.
“I came from the chateau. M’lord sent me to invite you to his grand ball tonight,” says the halfling.
Bec explains that we were attacked by another group of vampires after Lestache left. Oz asks the halfling (in halfling language) if he saw the wolf and points at Freki.
The halfling is impressed, but he doesn’t know anything about werewolves. Bec tells him that Malak got away. Oz complains about the fireball, not knowing Vondal is the one who cast it. The halfling extends this offer to us: if we attend the ball, we have Lestache’s word that we’ll be safe before and after the event. That makes me ask, not during? He rattles off a list of calamities that Lestache promises will not befall us: we will remain alive, unharmed, unturned, unbitten, not food for Lestache or any of his kind. Also, we get to stay in the halfling’s house. Freki asks him if he’s ever heard of a union, and suggests he find some other familiars for collective bargaining purposes.
Our guide, Bilbo, gives us a little flying carpet tour of Sepulchris, the underground vampire city. He points out “Malak the Mad’s” place. Bec asks how Malak knew where we were, and Bilbo answers that he “couldn’t say” (um, sir) but Malak is known to have prophetic visions sometimes. He points out another enormous castle-looking residence belonging to “Enoch the Wise” and suggests not to go there, saying the Ventru are known to be ruthless—but then everyone is here. He sounds pretty over it. I ask him how he came to be Lestache’s familiar. He says he won’t tell the story for anything less than three pints of beer. Noted!
Oz decides to put the Panache on Bilbo. Now they’re temporary besties! He tells Oz that his home is guaranteed safe from vampires. The whole thing is ringed with garlic and there are stained glass windows with images of ravens: circling above a field of corpses, pecking out an eye. There’s a figure in a cloak. I recognize these as related to Nerull.
Bilbo welcomes us in and goes to make tea. When the door closes, he breathes a sigh of relief. He points out a talisman of Nerull. Every door and window has a talisman. He warns us not to remove the talismans or open the doors or windows for anybody. Vampires can’t come in without an invitation. Oz asks him again what his deal is. He says “I love it here!!!!!” in a weird way that doesn’t seem one hundred percent genuine. “I’m treated well and have more freedom compared to other familiars. They tend to get eaten fairly quickly in these parts. My master knows this, and allows me these protections and creature comforts to help keep me safe.”
Bilbo toasts “to the living—may we all stay that way!” and offers us ale and tea. Freki asks if he has family, and toasts them. He asks why Freki is so calm, and Freki says he has good friends. (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) Freki was a lone wolf, but he was looking for a reason to join a team. He joined for me, awwwww. Bec says her mother died and her father disappeared, so she joined the SPI to find him.
“What’s the SPI?” asks Bilbo.
“How does this guy not know the SPI?” Oz asks in response.
“He lives under a rock,” I point out. Well, it’s true!
Freki asks what Cal’s deal is. Explain yourself, shortie! Being a little drunk, Bilbo spills that he thinks he might recognize Cal. Is he from the Ranch? Cal doesn’t know that name. Bilbo is astonished to hear that he might be from the surface?! They agree that the surface Arallu is real, real bad (but pls don’t tell Lestache that Bilbo said so).
Bilbo proposes a game. Question for a question! He asks Vondal what’s his favorite color? Orange!
Vondal asks Oz for a list of all the languages he speaks. Oz answers in thieves cant.
Oz asks Bilbo how he came to be Lestache’s servant. Bilbo answers that he was fleeing vampires with a companion. The companion got eaten, but Lestache needed a new familiar to replace the one Malak ate. He asks Cal what it’s like on the surface. Cal says he spent a lot of time on glaciers and it toughened him up. Bilbo protests that it’s not enough of the truth, so he has to drink.
Cal takes a drink and asks, “How often does your master meet with the Triumvirate?”
Bilbo answers that he only meets with the Lord Brucolac, as all the clan leaders do from time to time. The Brucolac probably won’t be at the party, as such things are beneath him, but most of the clan heads should be there. Cal asks Bilbo where the Brucolac lives, and Bilbo says no one knows: he appears and disappears as he wishes. But you can always tell when he’s about to appear because everything grows dark and cold.
Bilbo asks Freki which of his friends annoys him most, LOL. Freki answers that his first journal entry was a note to kill Vondal in revenge for trying to kill Hugin and Munin. Also, Freki resents magic and the whole wild magic thing just skeeves him out. But then again, why can’t Oz tell the truth about something as simple as how many languages he speaks?!
Bilbo asks (out of turn) if this is Vondal’s real form? What in the world kind of creature is he, anyway? Has he ever had eyestalks? I say he’s a wild mage and not even trustworthy to himself. Bilbo asks Freki what Oz’s deal is. Freki says Oz is such an agent of chaos he doesn’t even know if Oz is on our side half the time. Cal says chaos can breed the end of chaos. Bilbo likes that logic. So Cal is a mastermind, channeling all of our chaotic personalities, is what Bilbo is getting out of this.
Freki asks why the spellcasters don’t guide the party more. Bec says she deliberates carefully. Bilbo says I, Callie, am wise and therefore avoid doing dumb things. This guy gets it! I use thaumaturgy to make a little halo of light appear above my head, but Vondal calls me on it, the bastard.
We’re really cool with this guy, so Vondal and Cal float the idea that Bilbo could go with us. Bilbo says his master needs him here. His eye twitches; Cal infers that he is under the influence of magical charm.
It’s Vondal’s turn, so he asks Bec if he looked good as a pony. Bec says yes, he wore it well. Then she asks him how old he is. Vondal says his consciousness is 87 or so. Oz says he trusts little about Vondal, like that time he put armor on an owlbear. “THAT OWLBEAR IS ONE OF THE BEST AGENTS WE HAVE,” says Vondal.
“Well, I believe that,” says Oz.
“How did the SPI get destroyed?” Bec asks Vondal.
“Mistakes were made,” says Vondal.
Answer the question, dammit! Vondal “explains” that he woke up in a dumpster and his meat suit was younger than it was before then, but his mind is still the same. The God of Dwarves came. He is very reluctant to talk about it, very unlike him.
Bilbo is like, “Oh, it’s his fault! He did something bad and doesn’t want to talk about it!”
Vondal admits that “Experiments were being run…on the thing that made the SPI blow up.”
“So the SPI blowing up, that was you?” Bec asks.
“No, it wasn’t me.”
“You were involved?”
“I was there.”
“You were indirectly involved?”
“Listen, girlie! I’ve had a paper published! I know what words mean!”
Oz, incensed by Vondal’s sexism, bounces his mug off Vondal’s head.
But anyway, Vondal explains that it was an accident. He was experimenting, and the god showed up, and then the dumpster. The course of events is clear!
“Did that bring the Flux here?” Bec asks.
“Nooooooo,” says Vondal.
“Then why is there Flux at all, and can we put it back?” Freki asks.
“It’s not your turn!” Vondal protests.
“I’d like to know that,” says Bilbo.
But Vondal wants to know if Cal is undead. Cal hates undead! But Freki hates magic but also is a magic, so the two things really aren’t mutually exclusive. Freki says that he is NOT magic, thankyouverymuch.
Bilbo asks if Cal has plans to kill Lestache. Vondal says we have no current plans. Bilbo says he’d be most distressed if Lestache were killed (*twitch*twitch*). And if the Brucolac were killed, everyone in Xaryuvia would be even more miserable than they already are. What’s that? His hometown. He asks if we’ve heard the name “Xaryu.” Some of us recognize it as an infamous crimelord from the Radiant Union of Pelor. He’s a beholder and also there’s a cult that worships him. Back in my very first case, we saw a Colosseum that was rumored to be backed financially by Xaryu. Bilbo used to be—and most of his people still are—in the thrall of Xaryu. He complains that he used to be a law-abiding cleric of Tiamat, but then he was banished from the colony and hunted by vampires. We’re kind of getting into the idea of liberating Bilbo’s family.
“Do you know the first thing about beholders?” asks Bilbo.
“Do they know the first thing about us?” asks Freki.
They’re aberrations, unnatural. They shouldn’t even be here. They’re covered in eyes, which makes it extremely hard to sneak up on them. In their lairs, it’s completely impossible. Beholders shoot petrification rays, but they do need a target or an inkling that there’s a threat. They’re also extremely intelligent, good at planning, and believe they are perfect and everything else is lesser. They dream, and sometimes pull things from their dreams into reality. That’s how they reproduce, but unfortunately (fortunately for us) they tend to fight to the death when they meet. Very rarely, sometimes they see each other as “me” and form a hive mind.
Bilbo says there are at least six Xaryu. Basically they keep the halflings as livestock for the vampires to eat. That’s why halflings get banished periodically. “You don’t stand a chance,” he finishes sadly.
“We’ve heard that before!” say Freki and Oz at the same time.
Bilbo is curious about the glacier. Who lives there? Cal says there weren’t more halflings there. He lived with a race called the giants. He was adopted. Or, y’know, traded. Acquired, even. To honor his father, he was given to his new father, and served (with) him until he joined the SPI. He spent a lot of time fighting off the undead.
“Vampires have to eat. It’s in their nature,” says Bilbo.
“They can eat my ass! We’re ending this slave trade!” says Oz.
“You were a sacrifice to the gods?” Bec asks Cal.
“My father’s not a god anymore,” Cal says.
Talking about studying the Arkenstone brings memories back to Vondal. He has some new ideas about how to enhance its resonance, so that it can reach its true structural potential. If he had access to the stone, maybe he could improve it!
Vondal drunkenly asks me: “How did you get two of them? Because normally they fight.”
It takes me a second, but I get he’s talking about my goddesses. I say they have a special relationship. He’s like, “THEY’RE THE SAME!!!”
There’s a knock at the door, and a feminine voice says, “It sounds like a party in here. Can I join?”
It’s Avandra! OMGOMGOMGOMG
She says quietly to me, “I know you like my sister better than me. But it’s OK, I don’t mind.”
Vondal says, “So you belong to her, then?”
Avandra puts a hand on my shoulder and says, “She’s doing a great job.” Cal senses shenanigans!
Vondal drunkenly complains that the gods should require their priests to be nicer to orphans. Avandra responds sadly that that isn’t how it works. If you want the gods to change, you have to change the worshippers’ hearts. She doesn’t want to be what people expect. She wants to be herself! But that’s because that’s what her followers want her to want. She can never truly be free.
“To true freedom!” she toasts.
“Anyway, I promise not to say anything about what I just figured out. I know that’s why you’re here,” Vondal says sulkily.
“Everything is not about you,” says Bec, who has been drinking tea the whole night.
Oz is really into rescuing the halfling village. Vondal and Bec corner him and ask what’s weighing on his heart. Oz pretends to cry into his beer.
“What I’m trying to excommunicate—” Vondal starts.
“Nope,” says Bec.
“—explain, is that Cal is growing. He’s opening up more.”
Vondal wants to sleep off the ale, so he crashes in Bilbo’s bed with Murky as a bat on his face.
Avandra flips Oz a wooden coin with her symbol on both sides and tells him to bite it if he ever decides to forgo the direct approach in favor of a sneakier one. “You’ll know when it’s time.”